Matthias's Last Adventure
by Thomas the Miller
Summary: Well, it's kind of strange. I thought one day about what would happen if all the Redwall mice got caught in mouse traps and here's the result. Oh, and I DO NOT really support the death of Redwall Characters. I was just bored. Please Review.


A Redwall Short Story

Once upon a time there was an abbey called Redwall. (The only abbey that has more than one gender or species living in it.) Everything was peaceful except on occasion when random evil animals attacked. Usually they were only attacked by rats, crows, foxes and other evil animals that were close to their size. Only, one day, Matthias the warrior who was always the one to defeat evil walked outside of the abbey to see a giant machine. His wife, Cornflower stood next to him and asked, "What's a Hitachi??" "I don't know Cornflower," Matthias said, "but it doesn't look safe. It almost appears as if it's going to knock over the abbey." "It looks evil!" shivered Cornflower. "We'd better warn everyone else."

Meanwhile… "Joe," said Bill, "I think that I saw some mice standing a couple of yards away from that bulldozer. "Mice?" Joe asked. "Naw. It cain't be. Those woodland creatures ain't gonna get in the way of this apartment complex development. But now that you think about it, Bill, there's some tiny building over there and I see mice too. We better get rid o' it fast. I see more than mice actually." "Golly gee Willickers Joe, you might be right!" Bill said. "I see Hedgehogs and Badgers and all kinds of 'em crappy creatures. What shall we do?" "Well, I propose a plan!" exclaimed Joe. "To get rid o' them pesky mice we better make some traps. We'll send the rest to zoos and petting farms. How much cheese you got?" "I better run to the store," Bill said.

Back at the abbey… "There's a giant evil machine outside!" screamed Matthias, running into the dining hall. "It's called a Hitachi!!" squealed Cornflower. "It's gonna exterminate us all!!!!!!" "We must all stay calm!" proclaimed the Abbot. "I'm not calm!!!!!!" screamed Matthias. "And if Matthias isn't calm we aren't!" yelled John church mouse. "Yeah!" echoed all the abbey creatures.

A couple hours later Bill came back with 50 whole pounds of cheese and at least 100 mouse traps. "They're so dead!" he cackled. "Let's set some mouse traps," said Joe. Joe and Bill set a whole ton of mouse traps around the abbey everywhere.

Back inside the abbey… "I'm going to go see if the coast is clear outside," Matthias told the other creatures. "Stay here, and if anything happens to me, DON'T PANIC. I'm hoping that the Hitachi is just passing by." Matthias carefully walked out of the door and opened it, only to be surrounded by cheese on every side. "Mmm!" he exclaimed. "Maybe I was mistaken and the Hitachi was really nice and left a gift because it was too enormous to fit inside the Abbey. I think I'll have some!" Matthias ran over to one of the traps and started nibbling at the cheese. Only then, it sprung down on his neck. "Gah!" He shrieked in agony. "Dad!" Mattimeo screamed from inside the abbey. "Matthias!" yelled Cornflower. She started sobbing. "I've never heard him sound like that." "I have to find out what happened!" squealed Mattimeo. He ran out the door in terror. "Mattie!" screeched Cornflower running after him.

When they reached the outside they saw it. There lay Matthias, bloody and dead in a mouse trap. Mattimeo started screaming. "Nooooooooo!!!!!!!!" Cornflower wailed. "One of the Hitachi's evil minions has murdered him!" After hearing the screeches from outside all the other abbey creatures looked too in horror. Only then… "Cheese!" yelled all the mice at once, running toward the traps. All the abbey's mice were now chewing on the cheese. The traps sprung. "It's the cheese!" realized Constance. Only then, a giant net dropped on top of the rest of the abbey creatures pinning them down. Then Joe shot them all with those dart thingies that make you go unconscious and loaded them into the truck and shipped them to the new zoo that was opening in Alaska.

"HaHaHaHa!" cackled Joe. "We win! Now we will demolish their doll house size building!" Joe and Bill started stomping on Redwall with their work boots. All the tiny mice size bricks crumbled to the ground. "Now let's get to building some apartments!" Bill yelled. "Yeah!" Joe said.

And to conclude this tragedy, that is the depressing, most unfortunate ending to this story.

**A/N Just to let all the readers know, I DO NOT support destroying woodland habitats and especially NOT Redwall abbey to build apartments, neighborhoods, grocery stores etc. so nobody hurt me for writing this. In fact I despise it. I just thought it would be amusing and original to do this, okay? It was my way of comic relief. I apologize.**


End file.
